Terror in Mumbai - do I fear death!

It was the evening before thanksgiving and as I drove up North with my munchkins toward Seattle, I received a text message from one of my employees "Did you hear about Mumbai"? I replied "No" and she replied "Terrorist attacks"! I was numb, but this was not an unusual news, its happened many times before - I could only reply "Ok"!


Once I arrived at the hotel and flicked the TV on to Larry King Live, I realized the gravity of the terror. Two major hotels that are major South Mumbai landmarks are bombed and attacked and many innocent lives lost. I was stunned and shocked. I could only watch it for a bit - my kids were ready for the night at the water park, I couldn't help but detach.



I remained detached for most of the weekend. I would go on the net and read through the sites on what the status was. It was incredible to see a group of 10 take on hundreds of police and commandos. It was war live on TV. I could only imagine the sinister planning that went into this. The Taj Mahal Heritage Hotel is a maze, most wonderful maze of rooms and floors with amazing antique furniture and wooden finishes. Just two years ago I spent and afternoon there with my family, lunch at the pool side restaurant. I just visualized it being gone. I was also at the Oberoi a few years back visiting a family member who stays there on every trip. His suite becomes a congregation of many family members who come visit. This was all to spooky and frightening and hit home, but I remained numb. I started questioning my own trip next week, where I fly into Mumbai, though only for a few hours, and then drive to Pune. What if the airport is next?



This whole 3 day ordeal affected me, but not until I went onto the times of India obituary section and then it became all to real and unbearable. It was unbelievable to see pictures of folks, couples, fathers, mothers who died in this ordeal. They all seem to have the date of 11/28/08 as their date of demise. Somehow 11/26 and 11/27 was skipped. I guess it was the day they were turned to their families. This whole incident has become overwhelming for me and I started questioning if I should travel to India at all.



I feel fearful, but then I recall the Sutra discussion from the week prior where the Sutras teach you be fearless, especially fear of death. So, I have decided to dispel my fears and move forward with my trip to India next week. How can I fear death? How can I fear destiny and how can I let the terrorists hold me back?

I will be flying to Mumbai next week and then will be in Pune for work and also attend Guruji's 90th birthday celebrations. The class on Sutras last week have given me much strength and a pathway to continue move inwards and find strength in dealing with trials and tribulations of life. Being in the present gives me the ability to stay calm and focused on whats most important in life - to shine your light and let your love and compassion lead you on while you leave your anger and ego behind.

Namaste

The Yogi

A Sutra Class with Chris Saudek

I had the pleasure of taking a two hour Yoga Sutra class with Chris Saudek, a well know Iyengar yoga teacher, who was conducting a work shop at the Julie Lawrence Yoga Center this weekend.

I walked into to find many of my fellow students from Sunset, along with Nina in the class. Everyone except for me had the Sutra book and a note book - I guess there was a required reading of certain Sutra's but somehow I missed that part. It wasn't really intimidating though - I was there to learn about the Sutras, even though I have made invaluable attempts to read through the Light on Sutra's book by Guruji, most of my learning has been through listening many of the teacher's especially Nina refer to the sutras in class and the one that I have been most impacted by is the sutra that tells us to be "indifferent, tranquil and detached".

It was a very interactive class, as Chris went through some selected Sutras and there were some interesting discussions and thoughts presented. Though I don't claim to be an authority on the sutras, but here are some of my interpretations of some of the essence of some of the Sutras that have had an important impact on me and my life and have changed my view of the world in the last three years:

1. The purpose of Asanas: Chris asked the class about their interpretation of the asanas, why asanas were important as one of the eight limbs of yoga. I didn't get a chance to put my two cents in, as I had already in some way challenged the notion of long, interrupted practice of asanas as a way to develop detachment. Asanas are invaluable in helping you go from "the outer to inner self", slowly and thoughtfully, but in a highly physical manner. It is the physical mechanism to activate your body to allow you to deep into your inner mind. Understanding of your inner self allows gives you a pathway to achieving detachment and neutrality.

2. Detachment : Detachment is really about being neutral and balanced. I feel we cannot be completely detached, complete compassionate, or dis compassionate, desired or undesired. Anything in extreme is unbalancing for our mind, body and spirit. Detachment allows to simply step away from situations and events and allows to experience and observe events that are distractions to our mind, disruptive to our lives, in a neutral manner. Detachment allows us to express the love and compassion that is seeded in our soul. Detachment gives us the ability to balance all the virtues and vices that are also seeded in us. It allows us to deal with our fears and insecurity.

3. The inner mind: Chris asked everyone to describe a picture of our mind. I answered "circle". She said a circle implies your mind is bound and restrained. I thought about some more and I think our minds are circular, but with a twist, they are really spirals, as a spiral is an evolutionary symbol. I think yesterday I was looking at spiral from the outside in, from the top view of a spiral. Mind evolves and circles like a spiral. To get to your inner mind is an evolution and the essence of the mind is really connected to your soul, what ties all of us together to form the collective soul, the higher being that we are all part of.

There were many other aspects of Sutras that captured my attention in the class, but the essence of what I took back was that we are on a journey, I am on a journey and yoga has helped me make this journey a lot more thoughtful and introspective, allowing me to experience life with a lot more calmness and detachment despite the constant storms and tribulations I face every day. I don't know the outcome of all this, I quite honestly no longer focus on the outcome.

I simply try my best to live in the moment and experience and observe every moment of life as it comes to me with as little malice, judgement, ego and remorse I can. I try not to look back or forward. I just try to remain in the moment. It doesn't mean I don't have visions, desires or purpose - but I make my best efforts to have the balance in order to remain in that moment. That is the essence of detachment and neutrality. That is what I have learnt from the little I have learnt about the Sutras in my journey in the last three years.

Namaste

The Yogi

Change and the world will change around us!

Lately, I have not been able to post on here as regularly as I have been in the past. I have really been quite busy with out of town travel and conventions and they can be most taxing in terms of time and energy. I have procrastinated on my yoga practice, but it is slowly coming back as Nuvana has returned from her one month in India and my one-one practice with her commences this week. I have been able to squeeze in my personal training sessions with Nick, and these are really unique as they combine strength training with yoga poses in mind. He has a back ground in body mechanics and yesterday we worked on a number of core strength work outs with weights that hopefully will assist me in a variety of standing poses.

The last few weeks have been taxing on everyone, with the economic meltdown and folks cutting back everywhere. I attribute this meltdown to greed, fear and insecurity. Many of us didn't buy risky mortgages and have regular jobs that didn't need to be impacted by such greed. Greed leads to fear and fear leads to insecurity and that leads to rash decisions, the very opposite of what we are taught in yoga. If we all just took a deep breath and remained calm through all this chaos, the world would not have been any different than what it was 3 months ago. Its amazing how a change in people's thinking about the world and the economy can leash such a calamity that in a matter of a few weeks, the entire world is in the middle of an economic meltdown.

So its time to change our thinking and our stand and being. Its to walk away from the darkness and the goom and doom, and time to walk outside to be under the bright sunny day. Its time to be more compassionate and giving and be less greedy. Its time to be more centered and detached from the chaos and fear, and think more positively about the future. Its time extend our hand out to others and see how we can help them, vs how we can take from them.

Its that simple of a change. And if we can bring that change in ourselves, I am sure the world will change around us! That is an essence of what I have learned in the last 3 years by practicing yoga. Last night I saw a small glimmer of that..... and I continue on this path of change one asana and one breath at a time. I wish the same for you.

Namaste!

The Yogi

Release yourself from pain and hardship!

Over the course of this blog I have written about the pain in my life but never discussed what this pain really was. Today a friend, or actually a group of friends asked me finally the "Question" - and I finally answered ... it was cathartic and I finally came to grips with my impending divorce and destruction of my family. These last 18 months have been most painful and my devotion to yoga has helped tremendously in dealing with this pain - but the pain is systemic - how do you deal with the destruction of your family and your life as it stands and how do you deal with the impact on your two little kids whose life is completely wrecked and destroyed. How do you deal with the marginalization of your time with your kids, who you love and adore and want to be with the most in such a turmoil in their life.

The family law system in the US and many western countries "marginalizes" loving and active fathers from their children's lives because it percieves it being in the best interest of young children. There is no consideration to the feeling of fathers and the children foremost, who are caught in the middle and cannot express their true feelings as they are torn in the middle. The pain and hardship is so severe that no yoga in this world can help manage or reduce it. You simply have to detach from it. The problem is systemic in this country, its like a disease and the worst form of discrimination as fathers are marginalized from the lives of their children. The children are mentally and psychologically damaged. I am a victim of this disease and so are my children. I only pray to the universe that some day this discrimination and disease is eradicated from the society. In the meantime I focus on my yoga and do my best to detach from the pain and put my energies in making the best use of my limited time with my children.

This evening with these wonderful and supprotive friends finally gave me the courage to open up. They have been silent and supportive all this time. I couldn't have asked for any more. I realized tonight that yoga helps you detach from pain and hardship, but the only way you can eliminate it from your life is to just release yourself from the pain. Guruji says "in pain there is salvation", but the real salvation lies in not just the detachment, but complete release from it. It means breaking all barriers that lock the pain inside you and let it out completely. I took my first small step this evening. Maybe you can try it as well.

Namaste

The Yogi

Its been quiet at the Yogi front

I am sure some of the readers are wondering what happened to my posts... I am here, I still exist, but I have been very preoccupied with travel and other commitments which have kept on the go for the last two weeks. Nevertheless I have tried to keep up with my yoga class at least once a week and some bare bones practice in hotel gyms. I also was exposed to two great sessions on wellness at executive retreat in San Antonio. The first one was by a Dr. Sushil Bhatia, a chemist by profession, but an entrepreneur and practitioner of yoga and meditation. He did a session on laughing yoga and also talked about stresses in the world of business right as the stock market was tanking.

He talked about meditating for 20 minutes at 2 pm in the afternoon. He will suspend his meetings and business to get this 20 minutes for himself. I have considered shutting my office door and trying some restorative Setu Bandh, but never a 20 minute meditation. He is a practitioner of Transcendental Meditation. It was an eye opener for many attendees and an affirmation for me - I am on the right track. My gym routines for strength building are working well. Today I had an hour session and then later I will be in a 90 minute level 3 yoga class. I can definitely feel more strength in my core and arms. I have also started focusing more on my diet. I have been adding more fruits and vegetables for lunch, as a matter of fact, today's lunch consisted of only a home made salad, fruits and a berry energy bar. I will pass on the berry bar next time. I feel peckish now, so had a banana. Feel more peckish, so there will be another fruit snack. Meals now consist of mostly Indian lentils, okra, rice and yes there is an occasional pizza with the kids. Thanks Skeptic Yogi for inspiring me to make an effort.

Namaste

The Yogi

Augmenting your yoga practice with strength training

I have recently started a personal training program at the gym. My trainer (Nick) has also been a fellow student in Nuvana's classes at the gym. He has since started teaching yoga at the gym. I picked Nick because of his yoga experience, though I cringe at the thought of how one can become a certified yoga teacher in 6 weeks. Only "Yoga fit" could answer that! :-)

I have had two sessions with Nick. His yoga background has really helped in putting together this program for me, though in a number of exercises, he gently reminds me not too keep my chest open so much, especially in pull ups. It is an interesting paradox and contrast to how we do poses in Iyengar yoga.

There is about 10-15 minutes of cardio such as walking or biking, which allows a more gradual increase in heart rate and then the rest of the time has been spent on mostly isometric exercises to work the muscles. These include sit-ups, pull ups, and some light weight training that is working muscles in the arms, stomach, legs, calves, and the core etc. The movements add some cardio to it as well.

I think a program like this is a perfect augment to my yoga practice. I need to build up strength in my shoulders, arms and core in order to do some of the more challenging inversions and shoulder stands. The cardio work out is important to continually strengthen the heart. For the last 12 months I have not been focused on this, and mostly yoga and have since gained some of my weight back, which has impacted my yoga practice as well.

So I am returning back to my old program of yoga, cardio (walking) and strength training to get my weight down, improve my strength and feel more energized. And I cannot forget about the "cleansing diet" that Skeptic Yogi has gone through. It is on my list, at the right place and right time, I plan to try that and see how it impacts me. The diet component is as important in the overall wellness. So I shall attempt it one step at a time.

Julie Lawrence graciously sent me the shlokas she recites from Bhagvat Gita at the end of her class:

Loka samasta sukino bhavantu.
Loka samasta sukino bhavantu.
Loka samasta sukino bhavantu.
Om. Shan’ti, shan’ti, shan’ti.

May the entire world be filled with love and peace!

Namaste!

The yogi

An insightful class with Julie Lawrence!

My friend Care, a fellow Iyengar Yogi invited me to attend a level 3 class with Julie Lawrence, director of the Julie Lawrence Yoga Center in Portland. Julie has been teaching Iyengar yoga for a very long time and many of my teachers were her students. Wednesday nights are becoming my yoga adventure nights; to try a different class with a different teacher. This class was quite different and Julie is a legend amongst the Iyengar Yoga teachers in the community.

The class was packed. Her yoga center is in the heart of downtown Portland near the Max-line, packed with restaurants, including my favorite Indian called East India Grill. It was a warm evening, probably the last warm evening of fall and the windows were open and you could hear the hustle and bustle outside as it was end of the day office hour and the restaurants were turning on their stoves with the wonderful smell of food being cooked gently floating in...

Julie had a sign up on a small whiteboard in front of the class. It had a quote from Yoga Sutras about friendship. She asked the class to make that the theme of the class this week. The invocation was done in Virsasana style and this pose was carried through many of the initial poses in the class. Additionally we performed an Adho Mukha Svanasana with arms flat in the Pinch Mayurasana form. All in preparation for poses such as Eka Pada Bhekasana (one legged frog pose).

I had a stiff neck and stiff upper back from an introductory personal training session at the gym- yes I am back on the dark side again to improve my fitness level, strength and cardio vascular training. Just a kick in the pants to get me back on my walking track.

I couldn't get into Adho mukha Vriksana, but I did get into Pinch Mayurasana twice. Julie's instructions were similar to Jen's on how to position your index finger and thumb on the blocks, along with rolling your wrists from the outside to inside. Up I went, but no balancing. Push your feet together .. I heard in the background. That's hard with my tightness.

We then migrated to Supta Virasana which I did just fine. There was not much adjustment needed and then onto the One Legged Frog Pose. That was my first time in this pose. I think I got a real appreciation of being able to push the sacrum down while raising yourself in that interesting contortion. Then it was onto Dhanursana - back bend. One of my readers mentioned that back bends connect you to your past as it gives you a chance to observe your past while you are in back bends.

In that moment I was so sweaty and exhausted, I was really only focused in the present. Julie said earlier yoga helps you be in the present - that made so much sense as I didn't seem to have any connection to my past. I wasn't thinking much in the class and neither was I feeling the pressure to grunt or groan or not. It was a challenging class, but I didn't feel like I needed to prove anything to anyone, including myself.

I was truly feeling myself and enjoying every moment of the warm breeze flowing in from the open windows. I was reminded of RIMYI, in Pune with the open windows with a lot less noise. But who cares about the noise - this is just part of the ambiance... there was no focus on the noise, external or internal as it really didn't matter. I was more focused on enjoying the poses and the pain that you are in when you are in long virasana position. Wait! Wasn't that mentioned in the sutra at the start of the class?

The last major pose was Halasana (with some variations). Since I had to use the chair, I couldn't do the variations. It was harder than usual, as my upper back was really hurting and I had frequently bend my knees which needed correction from Julie. She walked the whole class and there were lots of questions being asked. Once out of Halasana we went into a longer than normal Shavasana.

My eyes couldn't shut initially, so I just stared with a blank mind in the darkness and eventually the eyes shut. I was not asleep but I was out - I didn't hear the bell ring. It was very quiet. Julie then chanted another heart warming sanskrit shloka.. I don't recall all the words, but the last few were Bhavantu, Om Shanti, Om Shanti, Om Shanti! Peace is what that implies and peace is what I got at the end...

I enjoyed the class very much. Julie invited me to come back again which I will. My friend Care and I then walked across the street to the best Indian restaurant in town and I broke my 3 day vegetarian diet with my favorite Rogan Josh.

The lesson I learnt that evening was that being yourself is the best thing you can do for you. By focusing on yourself, you empower yourself to be who you are and try not to be who you are not. I realized that I have to strive to be present in the moment and not worry too much about the past, though I cannot forget my past. Being in the present means being surrounded by what helps you to who you are and not what others expect you to be. That is what yoga teaches you the most - Just Be Yourself! Thank you Julie Lawrence, I will be back! For more information on her yoga center visit jylc.com

Namaste

The Yogi