On Jan 5th last year I wrote my first post entitled the Power of Yoga. I finally share why I started this blog. It was on a whim and in reaction to an attack to my ego - very un-yogic I say. I was appalled to see a celebrity trying to teach overweight folks yoga, more specifically "Power yoga" on her blog. So that was my inspiration - not to teach yoga but share my journey and possibly inspire others.
I have to admit, that inspiration has transformed into an avenue where I can express myself and how I see the world, with yoga becoming the filter I put in front of my camera lens. I gave up many things in the last year, but I have to say with pride, I have not given up yoga and it has stuck with me like a loyal friend. Yoga has made me more aware and made the idea of pratyahara real for me, where I am able introspect and withdraw myself from the noise around me, by first simply becoming aware of through observation and then slowly becoming tranquil and start disconnecting by going inwards.
It has made an amazing transformation in my life and my ability to deal with stressful situations and individuals who create stress in my life. This blog has helped articulate and understand that better.
Despite this transformation, I am not above anything - I am as vulnerable as anyone else. I have my demons, and there are days when these demons come to life and start attacking me and distracting. Just tonight in my advanced class with Nina, I was distracted by thoughts that caused me to lose my concentration and with that you lose your physical strength and will to stay in poses. It is these stress missiles that are hard to get away from and I have found that back bends and inversions tend to bring these out even more.
But despite these distractions, I remain firm and committed to my yoga practice, my growing interest in the interpretation and understanding of sutras and most of all to get on the path of clarity and acceptance of my life the way it is now with a sincere hope for happiness to return someday to me and my two girls, who along with me sustain grief and struggle with the marginalization and deprivation they have been subjected to from my life. Nothing could be in their worst interest than marginalization of their loving dad from their lives.
Yoga has helped me tremendously to deal with this loss and I know deep down, some day the universe will change it. In the meantime we make the best use of the time we have together with a hope to a better future, as life can only get better when we have optimism and determination to sustain the pain with a smile.
I have been out of my posting frenzy for a few weeks. This is my restart - slowly but surely to write again. Thanks Nina for a great class tonight! And thanks to all of you readers who come frequently and the ones who send me comments. Thank you Karin Payson for the great picture with the Bellur School Kids. Its inspires me to write more..
Namaste
The Yogi
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